all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
