she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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