its not stalking. its research.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
tonight lets celebrate not being married
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
