My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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