you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
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