So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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