I don't think brook has ever known best
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
