She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i out mim tonsoeep
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