Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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