I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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