I'm going to jail i love you
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Randomize
