i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Randomize
