Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
