Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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