I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
