T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
