Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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