allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
