going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You're like the curious george of whores
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
