Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize