I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Come see our sink grown plant.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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