Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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