..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
