Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I am mentally ready for anal.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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