This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Randomize
