Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
