I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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