Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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