He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
