they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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