Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
