How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
