belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
