it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
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