Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
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