My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
