Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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