u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
