I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
