I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
