my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize
