Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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