hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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