We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
How does one acquire holy water?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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