god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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