Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
