What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
