I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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