you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
