My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
